Since I’ve Become A Child Care Provider

1. My coffee intake has dramatically increased.
2. I am pretty sure I can deduct Tylenol as a business expense.
3. I’m able to tell which child pooped just by the smell.  I still haven’t decided if that is a good or bad thing.
4. The children’s dinnerware, flatware, and drinkware always make it look like my dishwasher threw up a rainbow.
5. My lunches have sometimes consisted of the unwanted crusts of peanut butter and jelly sandwiches and I ate them standing up in less than two minutes.
6. It is to be expected that the children will automatically start screaming as soon as I turn on the vacuum or when the doorbell rings.
7. Quiet Time is sacred!
8. No matter how many times I tell the children to call me “Miss Cristina,” they will still call me “Mommy.”
9. I can’t pass the school supply aisle without getting at least five items for the daycare.
10. I still sing the “Clean Up” song when I am cleaning up after all of the children have gone home.