Remember in grade school when the mean girls would pick on other girls? I found out there is a girl like that in my daughter’s Kindergarten class who has been picking on her all year long. Nobody ever wants their child to be bullied, but luckily when children are this age, it is fairly easy to correct the situation by having a parent-teacher conference. Well, not in this case. You see, my daughter is the mean girl. She bullies herself.
Every day, my daughter finds a way to put herself down. It’s not uncommon to hear her say things like, “I’ll never be able to do it!” Growing up, I was taught that the more you practice, the better you’ll get, and that is exactly what I would tell my daughter. I realize now that was a mistake. For children with ADHD, practice makes perfect doesn’t necessarily apply. My daughter is extremely bright, but I have seen her try her absolute hardest to complete an assignment and still struggle with something I had her practice over and over again just five minutes earlier. Despite her best efforts, she still struggles and that truly breaks my heart.
My daughter is just a child and I fear for her. I fear that her constant negativity and self-bashing is going to turn into full blown depression. I worry about her teen years. I worry there might be a possibility we’ll have to look into the services of Honey Lake teen clinic or other similar facilities some time. Is she going to end up turning to drugs to escape? Trying to change my daughter’s attitude to a positive one and raise her self-esteem is a constant challenge, but at least I now know to stop telling her “practice makes perfect.” All I want is for her to try her best and if her best earns her a C instead of an A on an assignment, I have learned to be just as proud.